Insist on answers to your questions
Know your own motivations for asking these questions--ie what do you really want to know and why?
You can reframe ways of getting help
Tell your team how you want to receive information
Share your preferences for receiving bad news
It’s ok to change your mind
Ask: “Under what circumstances will I see my oncologist?”
Ask: “What am I not asking you?”
Distill your questions.
What do you really need from your doctor?
If your doctor can’t help you, ask her who you CAN talk to about it
Decide if you want big picture/details/timeframe/bad news, etc.
It’s ok to ask again
Medical team can be your friends
Be selfish--s/he works for YOU
State: “It’s hard for me to speak up. Give me a minute.”
Take someone to your appointment with you
Have a pre-meeting with your appointment friend
Bring an asshole (on your side… if you are timid, bring your pushy friend/sister)
Write down your questions beforehand
Email your questions to the doctor if you can
Prioritize your questions
Try power poses before the appointment
Unsettle your MD
Show your personality
Be a leader
You are in charge, like it or not