Here's the thing. We are all changing, all the time, everyday. Each day you wake up a little different than who you were yesterday. That is normal. That is growth. That is "your experiences shape you". People who stay the same are boring.... and non existent. We all evolve a little bit, and that's great. We are elastic, dynamic, interactive, ALIVE.
With a traumatic event, like a cancer diagnosis and everything that comes along with it, we change A LOT. Time is there so everything doesn't happen all at once, but our traumas... they happen all at once. All the sudden, instead of the invisible incremental changes you expect, you are a whole new person all at once. And it's weirder than that because you are simultaneously a whole new person and the same person you've always been. It's like you get the distance of years to see your current self/situation/life. You are you and you are not-you.
So, how do you navigate this new space as you and not-you? You reach out. You get professional help. You act with love and compassion and gratitude and joy as much as you can because THAT'S the world you want to live in, the world we are living in, the world we can create with our actions. It might be super shitty right this second, but it won't always be. Tomorrow will bring more change, and that can be a wonderful thing.